Published July 13, 2026

My Name Is Impossible To Know

The history behind my Chinese name and the hopes it carries.

Page 1 consists of 6 square panels with a light blue background. Panel 1 shows the author gesturing to the reader with one hand, saying, “so I have a name that’s impossible to know.” Panel 2-6 features a purple bubble on top of each panel with words representing the author’s internal thoughts while the rest of the panel demonstrates scenarios that happened. Panel 2’s purple bubble says, “It sounds like everything.” (“It” referring to the author’s name). Below the purple bubble, a group of speech bubbles illustrate a conversation between the author and a person. It reads: Author: “Hi, I’m Liyao” Person: “Leah?” Author: No, Liyao.” Person: “Leo!” Author: “Liyao.” Person: “Leanne?” Author: “No, it’s L-I-Y-A-O.” Panel 3’s purple bubble says, “And spelling it out doesn’t help.” Below the bubble, the conversation from Panel 2 continues: Author: “No, it’s L-I-Y-A-O.” Person: “L-Y-I-A-O” Author: “No, it’s–” Person: “L-A-Y-A-O?” Author: “No, L-I-Y-” Person: “... E-O! L-I-Y-E-O!” Author: “...” Panel 4’s purple bubble says: “Apparently my last name also blends with my first name.” Below, a conversation between the author and a customer service representative reads: Representative: “Okay. L-I-Y-A-O. And last name?” Author: “Liao.” Representative: “No, ma’am. Your last name please.” Author: “That is my last name!” Representative: “Sorry. Then what is your first name?” Author: “what” Panel 5’s purple bubble says: “At cafes, I stopped giving my real name.” Below the bubble, the author points a finger at a barista off-screen, who says, “can I have a name for the order?” The author says, “just L-Y!” Panel 6’s purple bubble says: “But even so, they get it wrong.” Below, a barista shouts, “Order for ‘Ly’ please!” Beside the word “Ly”, there’s an asterisk which leads to an explanation below the page. The explanation reads” “I always say the letters L-Y, but people mistake it for the Vietnamese name Ly. (pronounced “Lee”).

Page 2 starts with “Still, I refuse to get an English name.” Panel 1 shows the author’s name in 3 Chinese characters, and on top, it says, “These three words represent the hopes of the people who gave it to me.” Arrows point towards each of the words explaining what they mean. The leftmost word is “Liao”, which is the author’s family name. The middle word is “Li”, which means beautiful. The rightmost word is “Yao”, which means “a great mound of earth, like a mountain.” Panel 2 says, “The word Li was chosen so that I would grow up to be a beautiful woman.” The author’s mother holds the author in her arms as a newborn baby. Panel 3 says, “And the word Yao came from a fortune-teller’s visit”. The author’s parents open the door to welcome a fortune-teller into their home.

Panel 1 says, “He saw an abundance of water in my life, and so he suggested the element of earth.” The fortune teller looks over the author as a newborn baby, a smile on his face. The author’s parents stand behind him with looks of wonder on their faces. Panel 2 says, “because prosperity grows when there is water and earth.” Below the words is a fantastical and intricate illustration of a tree with red fruits and tangled roots in front of a deep blue sky. White mushrooms sprout from the roots of the tree. The illustration is also decorated by stars sprinkled throughout.

Page 4 features a single panel which says, “My name comes from a culture that is thousands of years old, laced with the history of my people, my clan, and my family.” In the background is a full-colored illustration of the Great Wall of China smoking in the back amidst green rolling hills, and a line of people dressed in ancient Chinese clothing emerging from the wall towards the foreground, carrying their belongings in a journey of migration.

Page 5 has 2 panels. Panel 1 features a family tree and it reads, “our genealogy traces back to countless generations, documenting stories of war, famine and southward migration.” Panel 2 features several iterations of ancient ways to write the word “Liao”, which is the author’s family name. It says, “In the shape of the words, you can catch glimpses of ancient history. Below the panels, words read: “But in English, all this is reduced to a bunch of sounds.”

The top of the page says, “In my life, my name has a strange way of making sense.” Panel 1 shows a calendar with the date “22 March,” and it says, “I found out that my birthday was also World Water Day.” Panel 2 says, “Like water, I’ve moved around a lot”. The illustration beside it shows a Chinese passport, a Singaporean passport, and a California Driver’s license along with a photo of the author. Panel 3 says, “And I never stay in one shape.” The author stands in the middle of the panel and says, “I wanna do all the things!”. Arrows point towards the author with words that describe her as a person: “Code switches between 2 languages and 4 accents.” “Ambiguous gender presentation.” “Illustrator.” “Writer.” “Ceramicist.” “Craftsperson.”

Panel 1 says, “in school, I became interested in ceramics, combining water and earth to create art.” The illustration shows the author in a studio hand building large vases. Panel 2 illustrates 3 vases made by the author and it says, “I find it fascinating that such a humble union of materials could result in such beauty and complexity.”

Panel 1 says, “Then, I found out that ‘yao’ (a word from the author’s name) is the basic form of ‘yao’ (another word written slightly differently in Chinese), which referred to the ancient kilns used to fire stacks of pottery.” Beside the words is an illustration of pottery stacked in an ancient kiln. Panel 2 shows the author squinting at one of her ceramic pieces and it says, “No wonder I feel so drawn to ceramics.” Panel 3 shows the author holding the same piece with a small smile. The words say, “It’s literally in my name.”

Panel 1 says, “I think I needed the earth to ground me in my craziness.” A close-up illustration shows the author carving the word “yao” into a vase. Panel 2 shows the author in her studio, holding her completed vase with a satisfied smile. It says, “No matter where I go or what I become, I know I’ll always be Liyao.” The words “Liyao” is written with Chinese characters.

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