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Published June 18, 2025

Hotel Dieu

Freshly sober, trying to sleep in the same room as a fridge full of alcohol was like trying to sleep in a room with a monster.
Page 1 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows a small guest house with a stone pathway leading to the door. Panel 2 says: “I was freshly sober and my boyfriend and I were visiting his family. We stayed in his uncle’s guest house.” above a suitcase. Panel 3 shows the protagonist’s boyfriend standing at a table in the guest house with a kitchenette and a fridge behind him, he is holding the suitcase from the previous panel. To his right the protagonist sits on a bed. The boyfriend says: “That was a great day. And I’m exhausted.” The protagonist says: “Me too.”Page 2 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows the protagonist grabbing the handle of a fridge to open it. She says: “Do they have water bottles? I’m so thirsty.” Panel 2 depicts the fridge, now open, filled with bottles of wine and cans of beer. Panel 3 shows the protagonist cowering back in fear yelling: “Oh god. Fuck. I have to sleep in here...? Uh... Urm... It’s just all wine bottles... and beer and liquor... All of it. Panel 4 shows the protagonist on her knees in front of the fridge, her boyfriend stands behind her. He says: “Oh. I’m sorry Emma. I can move it all to the other house. I know that this is a big trigger to be around.” She responds: No. Don’t. If you do that your parents will ask why and I’ll be so ashamed. I don’t want them to know I have a problem... And... It will make me feel weak. If you move it I still know where it anyway. But thank you. I need to do this myself.”Page 3 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows the protagonist laying on the floor with a tear running down her face. She is reaching for a lamp with a wine bottle for a base. Below, it reads: “But it was like sleeping in the same room as a monster. I couldn’t sleep or breathe. I wanted nothing more than... a taste.” Panel 2 shows the protagonist again on the floor reaching for the lamp. Now she is coming from the other direction and has one hand on the wine bottle base of the lamp. The lamp is on, giving off lite. Now instead of crying she has a twisted smile on her face and eyes wide.Page 4 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows the protagonist lying on the tile floor, naked. Her face is replace with a bottle of wine and she is huddled in something like the fetus position. Panel 2 says: While my boyfriend slept, I pace in the bathroom. Sweating and sobbing. And grinding my teeth. I stared at myself and tried to talk myself out of it. I screamed with a wash cloth stuffed in my mouth.” Below it shows her shoving a wash clothe in her mouth, tears rolling down her face. Panel 3 shows her looking into a mirror that resembles a mouth. Her reflection is grotesque with large teeth and dark shadows around her eyes. One monstrous green hand grabs her throat while another grabs the top of her head.Page 5 of 11 Page Comic: The protagonist is shown on the bathroom floor in a praying position, her face on the ground and again with her head pointed upwards and her hands clasped. A thought bubble emanated from her where she is shown again with bags under her eyes, clutching a bottle of wine to her face. Text says: And finally, as my absolute last resort, I got on my knees and prayed to God. I begged God not to let me take a drink.”Page 6 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows her hand reaching towards a wine bottle. Panel 2 shows her bent over a toilet with her face in the bowl, as if puking. Panel 3 shows her with ghastly skin and drool coming down her mouth. Text says: “If I hadn’t prayed to God. I might’ve drank myself to death.” Panel 4 shows her laying on her back on the ground, surrounded by empty wine bottles, crushed beer cans, and pools of liquor. Her skin is still the ghastly blue and her eyes are Xs, as if dead.Page 7 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows a large Christian cross surrounded by swirling clouds and angles. Faces peak between the clouds with different expressions, some wailing in sorrow, others in anger or fear, all of them distraught. Below it, it says: “I have come to know God.” Panel 2 shows her looking up at the cross in fear. Panel 3 shows her walking forward surrounded on both sides by red-hooded figures looking down on her.Page 8 of 11 Page Comic: An old church is shown without any roofing. Three large heads are looking down into the church, one has its face lowered in sadness, the second is wailing in sorrow, and the third is yelling in anger. Above them, text reads: “It isn’t your God. It’s something powerful that has no mercy.”Page 9 of 11 Page Comic: Panel 1 shows another large cross on a hillside, wrapped partially in barbed wire. The protagonist is on her knees beside is grasping the barbed wire, blood drips down. Text read: “It didn’t help me or answer my cries for the pain to go away. But it gave me Hope again.” Panel 2 shows the protagonist in profile looking up, with tears trailing down her neck. Panel 3 shows her hands outstretched, bloody cuts on her palms.Page 10 of 11 Page Comic: The protagonist is shown nude, laying on a cross in bed, as if partially crucified. She is smiling. Rich banners flow around her like a romantic painting, one says: “And maybe that God was me.”Page 11 of 11 Page Comic: The protagonist is sitting on the floor looking longingly at a bottle with a skull and crossbones on it. The bottle is in the foreground and appears much larger than her.

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